Do You Have The Courage To Do The Things You Are Afraid Of?

By relationship expert Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it.” – Nelson Mandela

“He who is not courageous enough to take risks will accomplish nothing in life.” – Muhammad Ali

“Success is never final and failure never fatal. It's courage that counts.” – George F. Tilton

THE WORD ‘courage’ always makes me think of the cowardly lion in The Wizard of Oz. I love that he does whatever he needs to do to free Dorothy.

His love for her is so strong that it overcomes his fear, and in taking brave actions on her behalf, he finds his courage.  

Do you have the courage you need to overcome your fears?

 Many years ago I worked with a man who been in the armed service as a parachute jumper. As part of his job, he would courageously jump into enemy territory.

Yet, when it came to feeling his feelings, he had no courage at all.

He was so terrified of his feelings that he lived his life numbed out, which made it impossible for his wife to connect with him.

He was working with me because his wife had said she would divorce him unless he opened his heart to her.

But, since love and pain are in the same place in the heart, to open to his love for her, he also had to open to his pain. And he was very scared to do that.

He said early in our work together that he would rather risk his life in enemy territory than risk getting emotionally hurt.

It took great courage for him to open to the deep pain that had been buried in him since he was a child.

Look inside and see what you have not had the courage to do:

* Do you hold back following your passion out of fear of failure?

* Are you relationship avoidant out of fear of engulfment – of feeling trapped?

* Do you keep yourself isolated for fear of rejection?

* Do you resist learning to love yourself out of fear you can’t do it?

* Do you procrastinate out of fear of being controlled?

* Do you avoid trying new things for fear of making a fool of yourself?

* Do you stay focused in your head rather than in your body, or numb out with addictions out of fear of getting hurt?

* Do you stay stuck in a job you dislike out of fear of failure?

* Do you stay stuck in an unloving relationship out of the fear of being alone?

* Do you avoid personal growth out of fear of finding out something about yourself that you don't like?

* Do you avoid opening to a spiritual source of love and guidance for fear of finding out that nothing is there, or that nothing is there for you?

* Do you avoid speaking up for fear of being wrong and being rejected?

* Do you keep yourself limited for fear of making mistakes?

Other ______________________________________________________

There is no doubt that it takes courage to risk making mistakes, or failing, or getting hurt, or losing yourself.

It takes huge courage to risk opening your heart and loving. One of my favorite quotes is this one by C.S. Lewis from The Four Loves:

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken.

“If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal.

“Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness.

“But in that casket – safe, dark, motionless, airless – it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.

“The alternative to tragedy – or at least to the risk of tragedy – is damnation. The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.”

It doesn't take courage to do the easy stuff – the stuff that doesn't scare us. It takes courage to do what it is what we are afraid of, and that’s what brings joy to life.

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including, “Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?” and “Healing Your Aloneness”.

She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now!

Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com or email her at margaret@innerbonding.com. Phone sessions available.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9036424

The #1 Key to Manifesting - with Gabrielle Bernstein

By John Lee of YourBestYouEver.net

MANIFESTING the life that you truly desire is one of the biggest themes in the world of self-help, personal development, personal growth or however you like to characterize it.

Author, speaker and TV regular, Gabrielle Bernstein

Much of this, in recent times, has been down to the success of movies such as 'The Secret', which brought the 'Law of Attraction' to a wider and more diverse audience than ever before.

Given the possibilities that it opened up, people the world over understandably embraced the notion of 'manifestation' whole-heartedly.

So why is that so many remain frustrated in their efforts to 'attract' their ideal life? After all, it's supposed to be a pretty simple concept.

And it's one that's explained in refreshingly 'stripped back' terms in the video below by writer, speaker and US TV regular, Gabrielle Bernstein.

The author of bestsellers such as 'Spirit Junkie' and 'Add More ~ing to Your Life', plus the newly-published 'Miracles Now' gives her personal view.

She talks about the importance of clarity and 'letting go'. And she offers her '#1 Key to Manifesting' in 3 simple steps.

The recording is just a few minutes long. But it contains some great information. Take a look.

Click here now: http://tiny.cc/soeudx

Mark Twain's Top 9 Tips for Living A Good Life

Originally posted by Henrik Edberg at 'Daily Good'

“It’s no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.”

“When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it’s a sure sign you’re getting old.”

“Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.” 

One of America's greatest ever authors - Mark Twain

YOU may know Mark Twain for some of his very popular books like Adventures of Huckleberry Finn and The Adventures of Tom Sawyer.

He was a writer and also a humorist, satirist and lecturer.

Twain is known for his many – and often funny – quotes. Here are a few of my favorite tips from him.

1. Approve of yourself

“A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.”

If you don’t approve of yourself, of your behavior and actions, then you’ll probably walk around most of the day with a sort of uncomfortable feeling. If you, on the other hand, approve of yourself then you tend to become relaxed and gain inner freedom to do more of what you really want.

This can, in a related way, be a big obstacle in personal growth. You may have all the right tools to grow in some way but you feel an inner resistance. You can’t get there.

What you may be bumping into there are success barriers. You are putting up barriers in your own mind of what you may or may not deserve. Or barriers that tell you what you are capable of. They might tell you that you aren’t really the kind of person that could accomplish what you’re attempting.

Or, if you make some headway in the direction you want to go, you may start to sabotage yourself: to keep yourself in a place that is familiar to you.

So you need give yourself approval and allow yourself to be who you want to be. Don’t look for the approval of others, but from yourself to dissolve that inner barrier or let go of that self-sabotaging tendency. This is no easy task and it can take time.

2. Your limitations may just be in your mind

“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”

So many limitations are mostly in our minds. We may, for instance, think that people will disapprove because we are too tall, too old or balding.

But these things mostly matter when you think they matter. Because you become self-conscious and worried about what people may think.

And people pick up on that and may react in negative ways. Or you may interpret anything they do as a negative reaction because you are so fearful of a bad reaction and so focused in on yourself.

If you, on the other hand, don’t mind then people tend to not mind that much either. And if you don’t mind then you won’t let that part of you become a self-imposed roadblock in your life.

And it is seldom too late to do what you want to do.

3. Lighten up and have some fun

“Humor is mankind’s greatest blessing. Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.”

Humor and laughter are amazing tools. They can turn any serious situation into something to laugh about. They can lighten the mood just about anywhere.

And a lighter mood is often a better space to work in because now your body and mind aren’t filled with negative emotions.

When you are more light-hearted and relaxed, the solution to a situation is often easier to both come up with and implement.

4. Let go of anger

“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.”

Anger is mostly pretty pointless. It can cause situations to get out of hand. And from a selfish perspective it is often more hurtful for the one who’s angry than the person s/he’s angry at.

Even if you feel angry at someone for days, recognize that you are mostly just hurting yourself. The other person may not even be aware that you are angry at him or her.

Either talking to the person and resolving the conflict or letting go of anger as quickly as possible are pretty good tips to make your life more pleasurable.

5. Release yourself from entitlement

“Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.”

When you are young, your mom and dad may give you a lot of things. As you grow older, you may have a sense of entitlement.

You may feel like the world should just give you what you want or that it owes you something.

This belief can cause a lot of anger and frustration in your life. Because the world may not give you what expect. On the other hand, this can be liberating too.

You realize that it is up to you to shape your own life and for you to work towards what you want. You are not a kid anymore, waiting for your parents or the world to give you something.

You are in the driver’s seat now. And you can go pretty much wherever you want.

6. If you’re taking a different path, prepare for reactions

“A person with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.”

I think this has quite a bit of relevance to self-improvement.

If you start to change or do something different than you usually do, people may react in different ways.

Some may be happy for you. Some may be indifferent. Some may be puzzled or react in negative and discouraging ways.

Much of these reactions are probably not so much about you, but about the person who said it and his/her life. How they feel about themselves is coming through in the words they use and judgments they make.

And that’s OK. I think it’s pretty likely that they won’t react as negatively as you may imagine. Or they will probably at least go back to focusing on their own challenges pretty soon.

So what other people may say and think, and letting that hold you back, is probably just fantasy and a barrier you build in your mind.

You may find that when you finally cross that inner threshold you created, the people around you may not shun you or go chasing after you with pitchforks. :) They might just go: “OK”.

7. Keep your focus steadily on what you want

“Drag your thoughts away from your troubles… by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it.”

What you focus your mind on greatly determines how things play out. You can focus on your problems and dwell in suffering and a victim mentality.

Or you can focus on the positive in situation, what you can learn from that situation or just focus your mind on something entirely else.

It may be “normal” to dwell on problems and swim around in a sea of negativity. But that is a choice. And a thought habit.

You may start to dwell on problems instead of refocusing your mind on something more useful. But you can also start to build a habit of learning to gain more and more control of where you put your focus.

8. Don’t focus so much on making yourself feel good

“The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.”

This may be a bit of a counter-intuitive tip. But as I wrote previously, one of the best ways to feel good about yourself is to make someone else feel good or to help them in some way.

This is a great way to look at things to create an upward spiral of positivity and an exchange of value with people.

You help someone and both of you feel good. The person you helped feels inclined to give you a hand later on since people tend to want to reciprocate. And so the both of you are feeling good and helping each other.

Those positive feelings are contagious to other people and so you may end up making them feel good too.

And the help you received from your friend may inspire you to go and help another friend. And so the upward spiral grows and continues.

9. Do what you want to do.

“Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did so.

“So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

Awesome quote. And I really don’t have much to add to that one. Well, maybe to suggest you write it down and keep it as a daily reminder – on your fridge or bathroom door – of what you can actually do with your life.

Article source: http://tiny.cc/zsnjbx

24 Wise Questions You Should Ask Yourself – The Year Gone & The Year Ahead

By Bernadette Logue

THE greatest block in your life is YOU.

The greatest solution to that block is also YOU.

If you do not learn from your experiences, and take control of your own energy (your beliefs, thoughts, feelings and actions) then you will surely continue to reap the same results and repeat the same patterns.

If those results and patterns are working for you, then great! 

If they are not, then below are 24 questions to help you tap into your own inner wisdom for the answers that will propel you ahead as a clearer, more inspired, empowered and insightful you.

Everything in your life stems from your energy and the paradigm through which you view the world. So it’s time to own that and POWER UP.

24 Questions

Grab a pen and paper, and answer these questions in relation to the year now gone and the year ahead:

1. What have I been doing, and continue to do, in my life that I know is NOT working for me?

2. Why have I not yet taken action to ‘course correct’ my journey in order to get different results?

3. What am I procrastinating about doing?

4. What negative habits do I have that I know I need to let go of? Click here to refer to our list “28 Habits that Block Your Happiness & How to Let Them Go”

5. Regarding the greatest challenges that I faced last year, what lessons did I learn that I can apply this year for my benefit?

6. Is there anything I intended to achieve last year which did not eventuate?

7. Did I invest my attention, time or resources into my personal growth, knowledge, well-being and/or happiness in any way?

8. What goal, dream or aspiration do I have for myself for the coming year that I’m ready to make happen?

9. Where is fear currently controlling me?

10. Am I feeling professionally fulfilled?

11. What would I most like to learn how to do or be for the year ahead?

12. How have I been using my “free time” and has that helped me feel inspired, vibrant, healthy and fulfilled?

13. Are my current habits for eating, drinking and exercising working for me or against me?

14. Am I holding any resentment towards others or myself?

15. How could I be of service in the year ahead in a way that will make the world a better place?

16. Which of my relationships need more of my loving attention to prosper?

17. Which of my relationships are toxic and no longer serve myself or the other person?

18. What have been my strengths and achievements in the past that I can celebrate?

19. Am I living a life that is meaningful to me?

20. Am I proud of who I am, how I behave and what I offer into the world?

21. What feelings dominated my experience of life last year?

22. What feelings do I most want to experience as I look ahead?

23. What I am most passionate about in my life that I’d like to do more of?

24. If I could improve one aspect of my life, what would it be? (e.g. relationships, career, finances, health, state of mind, emotional balance, adventure, self-expression…)

Set Your Vision

After you’ve answered these questions, it’s time to create a vision for yourself.

Let your answers above inform your vision for what is most important to you, in terms of how you want to be and what you want to do, what you want to achieve or to change, what actions are a high priority, and what positive energy and success mindset you want to enter… so that it flows on to create the results you deserve and desire.

Write your vision down! Make it real by taking it out of your imagination and putting it on paper. That act is one of declaration, taking something from an idea and turning it into a tangible written vision. This focuses your attention on what you want.

Article source: http://tiny.cc/bms3bx

The #1 Fastest Way to Eliminate Self-Doubt

By Natalie Ledwell

You CAN eliminate self-doubt

JACK Canfield, Bob Proctor, Joe Vitale, John Assaraf...

Since 2011, I've had the privilege of interviewing some of the most inspiring personal growth gurus in the world on my weekly web series, The Inspiration Show…

And one thing I can tell you for sure is that, just like you and me, they ALL have moments where they struggle with self-doubt and negative self-talk.

The fact is that there isn't a single person on earth who hasn't experienced doubt when striving for a specific goal.

As human beings, we all come wired with that little voice in our heads that evaluates what's going on around us and gives us a play-by-play of what we should do or say next…

And this "self talk" can either be your greatest ally, or it can be your biggest enemy.

Much of your self talk is reasonable: 'I better slow down or I'll get a  speeding ticket' or 'I'm really looking forward to having dinner with my friends tonight.'

But let's face it - your self talk can also be pretty negative and defeating, like 'I really don't think I can do it' or 'I don't know why I even bother.'

I'm a firm believer that the quality of your life depends on the quality of the conversations you have with yourself about what's going on around you…

So that said, the fastest way to experience more fun, happiness, love and joy TODAY is to start noticing what it is that you're saying to yourself.

Is your self talk mostly positive? Or negative?

Once you start tuning in to what your inner voice is saying, your next step is to shift it towards the positive as much as you can.

If you'd like to know how to do this, I recommend you watch this short 6-minute episode on how to eliminate your self-doubt - and it's actually a lot faster and easier than you may realize!

To your abundantly fulfilling life,

Natalie Ledwell

Click here for Natalie's video - http://tiny.cc/hu8xzw