Creating a Remix: Spicing Up Life When Life Gets Boring

By Dr Jaime Kulaga

"The grass isn't greener on the other side. It's greener where you water it." - Unknown.

"It is often possible to get greater enjoyment from what we are already doing, rather than try to find something else." - L. Don Siebet.

"The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet." - James Oppenheim.

YOU may have heard a couple of these quotes before. The reality is, many times we get tired of what we are currently doing in life and then we halt all operations to go find something new. 

When life gets boring... create a remix!

And halting doesn't always mean we halt the physical aspect, but it could mean we halt the mental aspect.

Meaning, we just shut down mentally and avoid, be mean or negative toward the current relationship or task. We cease using positive energy toward developing the old.

New means passion and excitement. That sounds very fulfilling and fun. But, don't new things get old at some point? Don't new things eventually get boring?

Think about a new hit on the radio that you love. You play it 100 times over on full blast and swear that you could never get sick of this one.

This song has a great beat and you can relate to every single word this singer is saying. But, after the 200th play, you find that you are quite sick of the song. How could that be?

You absolutely loved this one! Then, one day, as you are scanning the radio stations in traffic you hear that song.

Your beat just got a remix and it is mixed with an old song from "back in the day" when you were growing up!

This once boring song, with a little remix, was all you needed to be re-sparked before you found yourself singing at the top of your lungs in the car again.

Often, most everything that we want is right in front of us. It doesn't take an all-out manhunt of finding someone or something new to find happiness.

Happiness is often about rekindling the passion and spark with what you do have. So, go ahead, create that funky remix.

Here is an example of adding in a remix at work. In the workforce, you may find that you are sick of your job.

And while there are many reasons that it is a good idea to look for other work, there are also many reasons why you should or could stay and be happy doing it.

Try taking on a new project on a topic that interests you. Apply for an advancement or take on tasks that would align you with that advancement.

Get involved in work functions, and talk to more positive people at work.

Sometimes, relationships with partners get boring. We all go through a phase in life where we feel the spice is gone or the passion is drifting away.

Instead of putting in energy walking away from this person, use your energy to add excitement.

Talk together about the past and what added life to your relationship or look into each other's bucket lists and start knocking off some goals together. Listen to each other.

A great book on rekindling lost passion comes from Gary Chapman's, 'The Five Love Languages'.

Whatever it is in life that you have, before you walk away from it and expend your energy on finding something new, channel all that energy, positivity and time into what you currently have.

Being at a job for five years and choosing to put positive energy into it before leaving might yield passion, advancement and a greater sense of self-esteem and confidence.

These are the factors that lead to happiness.

Remember, if you're off to find something new, it will at one point get old, and you'll have to put just as much time and energy into that relationship, job or thing that you're being requested to do now.

Relationships can get boring, work can get boring, and songs on the radio can get boring. Instead of walking away from your favorite person, career or song, create a remix.

This week's goal: Find ways to add in a little mix to the areas within your life that you feel passion or excitement is slipping away from.

Dr. Jaime Kulaga is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Motivational Speaker.

She is the author of 'The SuperWoman's Guide to Super Fulfillment: Step-by-Step Strategies to Create Work-Life Balance'.

She is the inspirational founder of the nationally known SuperWoman Workshops.

Dr. Kulaga has been featured internationally for her expertise in Work-Life Balance. http://www.mindfulrehab.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/8960990

Tools To Make Your Self-Talk More Positive

By Dr Jaime Kulaga

WHO came with up with the slogan, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me"? They must have been a tree.

Words hurt. In fact, sometimes words are more painful than sticks and stones. Words become more painful than sticks and stones when the hurtful words about us, come from us.

Sticks and stones will break your bones, but negative self-talk will destroy you. Below are the top 3 tools for better self-talk.

#1: Get rid of the "Have To," "Must" and "Should" Talk

Those things that "have to get done" are part of a sabotaging mind habit we created for ourselves.

The reality is, a lot of what we do does not "have to" get done, or, if it does, it doesn't "have to" happen right then and there.

Using words like "have," "must," "should" and "ought" are words that fill us with guilt and anxiety. Women despise feeling guilty, thus to avoid feelings of guilt, we satisfy the "haves" in our lives before we satisfy ourselves.

Women often do not deem themselves as a "have" or "must" in their own lives, thus everything else is worked on and fulfilled, except them.

Despite popular belief, laundry does not HAVE to get done on the weekends. Weekend is a compound word. Week-end. Your week has ended.

Use this time to walk away from the "should" and "haves" in your life, and do the things that you really would like to do in life - like all those things you "missed out on" or "wished you could do."

#2: Stop Telling Yourself Everything Has to be Perfect

Perfection is subjective. That is why you should never try to be perfect for anyone or anything. If you spend your life trying to be perfect for someone else, you may find you are never perfect, for you.

Thinking that you have to be perfect at anything in life is not only a barrier to your goals and life fulfillment, but you have directly set yourself up for failure.

Don't spend your life trying to be something that doesn't exist. By striving for perfection, your mind and body will go one of two ways:

1. Back down altogether. Your mind and body are smart. If you set a goal for something that is not attainable (such as trying to be perfect) why even try?

Your mind and body won't waste its time and energy trying to strive for something that is unachievable. So, the mind finds excuses and the body will support that.

2. You will attempt your goals with perfection in mind, and then fail (because perfection does not exist). This pattern of attempting and failing lowers our self-esteem and sometimes our desire to set goals at all.

Instead of perfectionism, work toward self-actualization. Self-actualization means to develop your full potential.

You are always in the mind-set of growing and developing yourself. It is through striving for self-actualization that you will find Life, Mind and Body fulfillment.

#3: Recognize Life is Not Only Black and White

I get it, you don't have time. Neither do I. But the reality is, we are both thinking in black and white right now. Working out doesn't mean 60 minutes or 0 - all or nothing.

Working out to a ten minute app on your phone in the middle of the kitchen is still some form of exercise. It counts.

We often get stuck on thinking and doing things the same way for so long, that we forget there are so many other ways to make decisions or succeed.

If you think you exhausted every possibility, you're wrong. When you think differently, you open more doors for opportunity, doors you can't even fathom right now because you just don't know they even exist.

Talk yourself out of the black and white, and into the shades of grey.

Dr. Jaime Kulaga is the author of Type "Superwoman: Finding the LIFE in Work-Life Balance - A Self-Searching Book for Women".

She is the inspirational founder of the SuperWoman Workshops.

Dr. Kulaga has been featured in Glamour, Self and Prevention magazines as well as the show Daytime for her expertise in Work-Life Balance.

http://www.mindfulrehab.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/8629297

Boost Your Self Esteem With These 4 Tips

Guest post by Peter James Field

MOST of us could use a bit of a self-esteem boost now and then.

Self-esteem is all about how we feel inside. When our self esteem is low, we can find ourselves living with anxiety, we can be more prone to tolerating abusive behavior and relationships, and we can fail to live up to our full potential.

Even the most successful people suffer doubts

There can also be cons to high self-esteem. For instance, when a person's sense of self worth is much too high, it can become arrogance or what is termed 'narcissism', and this can create problems. Such people can find it difficult to accept and learn from their own mistakes and can develop a false sense of entitlement.

Developing a balanced level of self-esteem is key. For some, a healthy, high self-esteem comes naturally. But for others, growing a healthy self-esteem takes some effort. Check out these pointers to give your self-esteem a boost.

1. Draw up a list of your good qualities - For some people with really low self-esteem, even contemplating making a list of their good qualities seems like an overwhelming task, but it can be extremely helpful for raising self-esteem.

If you find this task challenging, consider what others say about you. What positive compliments have you received? Begin with those and then work from there. Jot your good points down using "I" and the present tense. For example, "I am a thoughtful and considerate person."

2. Regular affirmations - Take another look at the list you made. Select your favorite qualities to use to do daily affirmations. Take those statements and jot them down on cue cards and stickie notes. Stick the notes where you will notice them everyday, such as on your computer screen, mirror, or refrigerator.

When you see them, take a few minutes to repeat them over to yourself. Put notecards in your purse or wallet where you are certain to come across them at least once a day. When this happens, take a moment to read them to yourself a few times. After a while you can change out some of your best qualities for some of the other qualities on your list.

3. Gain some perspective - People generally don't talk about their challenges, disappointments, and struggles in life, but that's not because we don't encounter them. How we decide to approach these things will directly affect levels of self-esteem, happiness and success.

The really successful and confident people in life aren't those who have encountered few problems and challenges, they are people who have viewed them as just a part of life and have powered through anyway, learning as they go. Your failures don't mean that you are a failure, they just mean you need to reassess the situation as well as your approach to it and approach it from another angle.

4. Make yourself a priority - Part of increasing your self esteem is accepting you are worthy of your own love. Make time for yourself. Take care of yourself when you're having a tough time. Say 'no' when you have to and don't feel bad about it. Make your needs clear to others and ask for what you need. (If you find it difficult to say 'no', then look for some assertiveness training, or check out a book on the subject.)

Use these 4 simple tips and you will enhance your self-esteem. Above all, make sure you are kind to yourself and give yourself as much love as you give to the important people in your life. You absolutely deserve it!

Peter Field's new book on hypnotherapy The Chi of Change is published by Psyche Books. Info on sessions may be found on his Birmingham hypnotherapists website.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/8460370

‘The 3 Secrets to Living a Life Full of Miracles.’ - with Marci Shimoff

Posted by John Lee of YourBestYouEver.net

IF there's one person who could confidently place herself at the forefront of the personal development world, it's best-selling author and star of movies, 'The Secret' and 'The Keeper of the Keys', Marci Shimoff.

Not that she'd necessarily make such a grand claim, but few would dispute her right to do so, given the remarkable body of work she's created over the past 30 years.

Speaker, and author, Marci Shimoff

In this video interview with Mind Movies' Natalie Ledwell, Marci talks with characteristic enthusiasm about her own personal development and the growth of the industry in general.

She also presents her latest work - a forthcoming free, global, online seminar entitled, ‘The 3 Secrets to Living a Life Full of Miracles.’

Among the subject she covers in the interview are:

* Why her own huge success initially failed to make her happy

* The 'Happiness Set-Point'

* The difference between 'self-love' and 'self-esteem' and why it's so important

* Reaching and living in the 'Miracle Zone'

She also shares an incredible true story of a genuine miracle experienced by a Hungarian refugee who arrived in the US following World War Two.

And there are full details of how you can join her seminar and learn those ‘3 Secrets to Living a Life Full of Miracles’ all for yourself.

Just click here now: http://tiny.cc/23yaax

Don’t Die With Your Music Still Inside Of You

A brief story of two sisters with a long awaited dream – By Victoria Phelps

IT was a Sunday afternoon and my sister Hollie and I got cozy on the sofa to watch Dr Wayne Dyer’s movie ‘The Shift’. We were both snuggled and enjoying the inspiration.

Soon into the film, Wayne began telling the story of a Russian guy who, on his death-bed, was reflecting back on his life and questioned if maybe he had got his whole life wrong.  

This story had an impact on Wayne, so he wrote a note to himself which said ‘Wayne, don’t die with your music still inside of you’.

I took a deep breath as these words echoed – they pulled on my heart and instantly my eyes filled with tears, I paused, wondering what may be going through my sister’s mind.

I turned to look at her and she sat with her head in her hands.

Dr Wayne Dyer didn’t mean ‘music’ as literal, of course, he was referring to not dying with his dreams, passions and purpose, still inside of him. However, for my sister, it was literal.

Ten years previous, Hollie had been asked to sing at a private event for His Royal Highness Prince Charles, The Prince of Wales. She performed for him acoustically and with a band. 

After he'd left, one of the organizers came to Hollie and said that Prince Charles had said: “The young lady Hollie Barrie has a fantastic talent and somebody needs to discover her”.

Since that day, his words have rung in Hollie’s ears.

And every day since she has dreamed and longed to be ‘discovered’ and have her songs heard at an international level. After ten years of chasing this dream, it still hadn’t yet been fulfilled as Hollie had hoped.

Once we had finished watching the DVD, Hollie and I chatted about our journey and our frustrations and I promised my little sister that I would help her all that I could.

I’ve always loved a success story – how someone with nothing more than a dream and determination has created all of their desires – and I wanted this for my sister as much as she did.

Of course I had no idea how I was going to help, as we had already been pursuing this dream for some years but in my heart I believed that any dream is possible.

The very next day after watching the Shift DVD, and promising my sister that I would help her, I set to work by reading up on success and I came across a document which introduced the idea of creating your dreams and your ideal life by acting from inspiration and working with the universal laws.

I’d never heard of this concept before. Up until this point the advice for getting what you want had always been ‘do more than anyone else’, ‘work harder than everyone else’, ‘look after yourself first, get in there before they do’.

And yet this document was suggesting that you create your ideal life from inspiration, energy, beliefs, thoughts and feelings.

I delved into this further, studying at a certified level on subjects such as self-esteem and the universal laws. 

Self-esteem deals with everything, from our grades at school to happiness, personal relationships and our annual income.

Our self-image, self-love, self-value and self-worth create our self-esteem and they will each contribute to creating our dreams or not, because they determine our level of confidence, personal power and self-belief. 

Understanding the universal laws is understanding how to work with life’s magic to turn your wishes into reality.

It’s having an awareness that everything is energy, it’s getting clear on your true purpose and it’s living and acting from inspiration rather than motivation.

Everything I learned I shared with my sister, each day doing something to increase her self-esteem and take inspired action.

It wasn’t an overnight transition. It takes time to switch from acting out of inspiration instead of motivation but a little encouragement and support each day has been key to staying focused and listening to the heart’s desire.

After a few months, Hollie was closer to living her dreams than she had been in the previous ten years.

She was approached by a successful manager who wanted to represent her – they then signed contracts with one of the top entertainment agents who represent some of the biggest artists around the world and she began to perform more regularly.

As her confidence grew and her music was being heard, producers were agreeing to work with her for free as they wanted to be part of the vision. She began to blossom as she spent more time in the studio creating songs with other musicians.

From a young age my parents drilled into my sisters and me the importance of enjoying life and following your dreams.

Sometimes I would go to the recording studio with Hollie and it was fabulous to see her excited and enjoying herself and it would make me come alive also. 

Not because I have any ambition to become a singer myself (I certainly wasn’t blessed with any talent in that area) but because there is something very empowering and contagious about being in the presence of someone who spends their time doing what they love and fulfilling their purpose. 

It’s been so wonderful to see Hollie’s dream unfold. As she became better at listening to her heart’s desire, her vision began to change as to how she wanted to fulfill her purpose as a singer.

When you work from inspiration you enter into a new level of creativity. Hollie’s writing skills evolved and songs started to flow out of her.

She was constructing and producing songs with ease and soon her first album was complete, and she became contracted to write songs for other artists, TV and films.

That’s the thing with creating your life and dreams out of inspiration, your dreams come to be bigger and more beautiful than you can ever imagine.

If you’re ready to see your dreams unfold – whether that be to fulfill your purpose, start a business, create financial freedom, travel the world or to just be happy – Victoria Phelps would recommend that you first become mindful of your thoughts because what we think, we become.

For every happy and successful person, you will always find a mind abundant with empowering thoughts. 

What you think will determine your destiny, so make sure that your thoughts support the dream you dream. www.TheDailyPowerThought.com

Article source: http://tiny.cc/InsightOfDay

 

Post by John Lee and feature by Mike I McClement

Whenever a New Year comes along, many people seem to approach this perceived milestone – even though it's a mere passage of time – with a certain amount of trepidation and often a very worthy determination to make their life more enjoyable.

So I thought this highly practical guide to building your self-confidence, self-belief and self-esteem by personal development coach, Mike McClement, might be a useful addition to my blog. As you'll see, it's full of great advice and is an excellent way to take stock of your life.

Over to Mike...

1. Know what you look like
Find out how people perceive you... if you look as though you lack confidence, then people will treat you as though you do. In other words, you're already on the back foot and it'll be a lot harder to get people to listen to you.

2. Sort out your body language
Like it or not, people suss you out quickly, mostly by taking in your body language and sound. So get yourself in front of a mirror and be honest with yourself. Do you look confident? If not, why not? Then practise looking confident. Look at your posture, your facial expression, your clothing... Sounds mad but it works.

Confident people are happy people

3. Don't say sorry
Are you a serial sorry sayer? A lot of people who lack confidence are. They apologise for everything. Well don't. Only apologise if your actions warrant an apology. Some people prefix everything they say with a 'sorry'. This is completely unnecessary and suggests you doubt yourself. You might as well hang a sign around your neck saying 'I lack confidence'.

4. Remember you're not unusual
Realise that you're not unusual. Even truly confident people have their ups and downs. They accept this as part of life. An embarrassing situation is an embarrassing situation.. so what? It happened, there's nothing you can change about it. So learn from it and move on.

5. Be realistic
Accept that you're not unlucky. No one was born confident. Confidence is a skill you can actually learn. Accept this and start to learn. Just like any other skill, it requires practice and self-discipline to get good at it. We can all do it as long as we accept the challenge.

6. Think positively
Understand your mindset. Be honest with yourself... are you a positive or negative thinker? Are you a pessimist or an optimist? This is important. It's impossible to feel and look confident if you approach life negatively. A problem is a challenge, a mistake is a lesson to be learnt, a failure is a fact of life.

7. Know where you're going
You'll achieve little, if nothing if you don't have a focus. So work out what you want to achieve, both at home and at work and write down a plan. Think strategically (say over 2 years) and more tactically (say 6 months). One leads on from the other - think strategically first and then decide what you need to do tactically to achieve this.

8. Be happy
Think carefully about what makes you happy and get some of it. Confident people tend to be happy people - just watch them and you'll see. That's because they've found a balance between the things they have to do and the things like doing. They're also realists. They accept that life is life and there are some things that just have to be done but they don't let these bog them down.

9. Smile more
Sounds mad but it's true. Smiling really does help you to feel and look more confident. Someone who walks into a room smiling looks confident. It's a fact. It's also true that smiling actually makes you feel happier. It releases endorphins into your system. This even happens when you make yourself smile... So it's worth the effort.

10. Control your emotions
Control your emotions but don't stifle them. Think about how you let them out. Don't make a fool of yourself. Take a deep breath, maybe a few minutes too and then explain your feelings in a controlled way. Confident people have the self-control to do this.

About the Author
Mike McClement is a Personal Development Coach and author on confidence. He is passionate about helping people develop their confidence and self esteem in both a personal and work environment.

To find out more about Mike visit http://www.think-confidence.com
Complete a free communication style questionnaire at http://www.think-confidence.com/questionnaires.html

(c) Mike McClement. All rights reserved worldwide

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Mike_I_McClement

Do You Trust Your Self?

By Dorothy M. Neddermeyer, PhD

That question might seem off the wall, because doesn't everyone trust him/her Self? Is it not a given everyone trusts him/her Self? Do you or someone you know have issues with trusting people?

At some time in your life you have probably said, "I can't trust___(fill in the blank). However, did you know that it is not typically 'them' that you can not trust? It is your Self!! Wow! That is a huge statement.

Your body and the world around you will give you all the signals you need to navigate through life. Physical pain, dysfunctional relationships, career issues, addictions, etc. are all symptoms to ring the bell that something is not working.

Your sensory nerves tell you when the flame is hot. Your mind interprets that signal and tells the hand to move further away. Simple enough – right? But when it relates to the many aspects in navigating your life, you make mistakes in the interpretation or fail to act even though you know the truth of the matter.

The majority of people fail to allow the signal to register. Intuition is ignored in favor of the indoctrinations and conditioned beliefs that have been accepted as iron clad truths. Thus, rocky relationships continue in spite of many red flag warnings, primarily to protect the ego – because no one wants to acknowledge a mistake. However, there are no mistakes in the universal law of life.

Every person who comes to my office with relationship trust issues admits – once we have done the work – that she/he had all the information that was needed within the first hour, date or a maximum of three dates to determine that the relationship would be on rocky ground.

Yet she/he chose to ignore his/her intuitive knowing because she/he was lonely, needy or worst of all needed a way to continue self-sabotaging behavior. She/he thought this person would be the exception, or another excuse to continue a pattern of dysfunctional choices.

We have all done the same thing or something similar, in our quest for emotional and spiritual evolvement. Some people then, blame the other person(s) without taking any responsibility. They might blame God, life or whoever else can be blamed as long as one can avoid taking responsibility.

So what do you do about it?

The first thing you need to do is take responsibility for your choices – good, bad or neutral. As soon as you take responsibility for your choices – no matter what – you have empowered your Self to make better choices next.

Secondly, you need to know who you are as best as you can. You need to recognize your weaknesses, your shadow. You need to accept what is really motivating you at every moment, especially when it is with regard to people and close relationships.

Your weaknesses that might hinder your intuition will include loneliness, financial issues, insecurity, or low self-esteem. Your need to compensate for your weaknesses will prompt you to overlook the signals; from the other person, who may not have your best interests at heart. Remember, the other person is operating from the desire to fulfill his/her needs and compensate for weaknesses.

Consider this experiment. Think about a relationship that went sour. Start from the first moment you met him/her. Did you allow your Self to 'read' the signals? At what point in the relationship did she/he give you all the information you needed to know that the relationship was on rocky ground?

The signals include the way she/he speaks about previous relationships, the way she/he treats service personnel in a restaurant, the way she/he speaks to you or treats you, or sometimes she/he has a distinctly different philosophy about life than yours.

Next time; you notice any signals – that something might not be all that you hoped it would be – take a breath, step back, and take your time with the relationship. Listen to your intuition. Pay close attention to what you are learning about the other person and to your feelings regarding it.

The most important part is this: act accordingly. No denial or ignoring these signals. Consider them a gift that you can use to prevent your Self from being in the wrong relationship, friendship or business relationship. If you receive negative signals, you need to overcome your neediness and weaknesses to do what is truly right for you.

Because in the end, it not about trusting him/her – it is you trusting your Self to do exactly what you need for you. It is all about trusting your Self. Because if you trust your Self, then everyone you choose will meet your needs of trust, integrity and respect that is required for a healthy relationship.

Dorothy M. Neddermeyer, PhD, metaphysician – certified hypnosis practitioner, author and speaker. Dr. Dorothy facilitates clearing blocks, fears and limiting beliefs. You can live the life you desire. She brings awareness to concepts not typically obvious to one's thoughts and feelings. http://www.drdorothy.net

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Dorothy_M._Neddermeyer,_PhD