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Showing posts with label self-confidence. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self-confidence. Show all posts

Tuesday, 22 August 2017

11 Habits of Wildly Successful People

By Barrie Davenport & liveboldandbloom.com

THE truth is, a large part of what we accomplish in life is governed by our habits.

Habits can lead us to think and act in specific patterns, as they rewire our brains with neural pathways that make the behaviors almost automatic. 

Discover how you can be 'Wildly Successful', too
Because our habits are so powerful, it is important to pay close attention to the ones that have the biggest impact.

While luck and genetics play a role in your long-term success, there are certain learnable behaviors that will make you more likely to be successful in all your endeavors.

In fact, some “keystone habits” can compel you to perform other positive behaviors, creating a string of good habits that can significantly improve your life.

Many of these positive habits don’t require a major life change – which is hard to pull off without employing dozens of habits.

Instead, making a few small changes to your daily routine can potentially result in an unexpectedly large payoff.

People who are wildly successful – like Warren Buffet, Bill Gates, Oprah Winfrey – understand the secrets of developing these small daily habits.

Here are 11 habits of successful people that you can adopt in your life:

1. They practice willpower

When you are working toward a goal, it is important to think about what you want vs. what you want right now.

Successful people have the strength to finish what they have started without procrastinating.

When you want something and have a clear long-term goal, you will make it happen.

Some of the world’s greatest achievers are people who have a laser focus on their goal and are therefore consistent with their efforts.

2. They read

We know that reading has considerable benefits, from improving your overall health and well-being to expanding your capacity to have strategic decision making.

People who read are constantly learning about new things, whether it is the biography of someone who was successful before them or just the current events in the news.

Reading can also help improve writing skills and alleviate stress.

3. They have a morning routine

Developing a morning routine and sticking to it gives structure to your day and allows you to have the energy to accomplish everything that is important to you.

Some common morning routines include:

  • Gratitude meditation
  • Exercising
  • Journaling
  • Mapping out your MITs for the day
  • Responding to important emails
4. They don’t sweat the small stuff

People who are successful don’t waste their time worrying about small matters that do not have an impact on their long-term goals.

Instead, they let those things slide or put them aside to deal with later when they are not trying to focus on their work.

Time is a very important variable in the things that we are able to accomplish and the people who choose to spend their time wisely are able to be more successful than those who waste time worrying about irrelevant matters.

5. They wake up an hour early

There is another hour that you can use in your day to accomplish great things, but you may have slept through it most of your life.

Waking up an hour earlier than usual will take some time to adjust to, but once you do, you won’t want to go back to sleeping in.

Early risers tend to be more dedicated and optimistic than those who choose to sleep in, and they are able to anticipate upcoming problems and conquer them more efficiently.

This is a crucial element to success in the business world.

6. They complete THAT task first

There is always that one task that you really don’t enjoy doing, but you absolutely have to in order to continue with your work.

Maybe that is calling a certain client that you have to talk to on a regular basis or creating a report that is just tedious.

Reprioritize your to-do list by placing your most dreaded task at the top of the list.

Rather than allowing it to loom over you all day while you are getting other things accomplished, save yourself the stress and get it over with first.

This will provide you with a sense of relief and allow you to be more willing and able to complete any trivial tasks that follow.

Remember, you usually have the most energy in the morning when you are feeling the most rested.

7. They find their mantra

What is your core motivation for being successful?

Is it so you can provide for your family, or retire early and travel the world?

Remember your motivation and create a mantra that will help keep you going during times of stress.

Repeat your mantra to yourself each morning while you are taking a deep breath and relaxing.

This will help you feel more motivated and focused throughout the day.

8. They make sure to set aside time to get exercise

Exercising not only gives you a boost of energy, but it also helps to keep your brain sharp and your stress levels low.

Exercising will help you feel ready to take on any issue that comes your way.

It is best to get your exercise over with in the morning, because studies have shown that you are less likely to skip your workout if you do it first thing in the morning before you have time to make an excuse to put it off.

Even if it is just a fifteen minute run in the morning, get some physical activity and get your body moving.

9. They keep their space organized

Whether it is their desk at work or where they handle business at home, there is no clutter or unnecessary items filling the space of people who are successful.

They throw away old papers and excess items that are not used on a regular basis because these things only add a distraction.

Take some time each day to clean up your working space and organize your papers and projects from the day.

This will help set you up to be ready to work the next day without having to deal with any clutter.

10. They are self-confident

Self-confidence is born when one is able to master their skills and their talents.

This is a slow process that builds a sense of trust in yourself, letting yourself know that you know what you are doing and that you are good at your job. This is a key element of success.

It is important to realize that being self-confident also requires a sense of self-awareness. Successful people know who they are and have a defined vision.

But while they know their strengths, they are also very aware of their weaknesses.

This allows them to know when they need to seek outside help with a project or get a second opinion.

People who have the most success are aware of the instances in which they need to rely on someone else who may be more equipped to handle a specific problem than they are.

11. They contribute to others

One of the habits of successful people that may seem counterintuitive is to give to others.

People who are successful make it a habit to provide other people with things of value.

Whether that is intangible items such as knowledge or support or tangible things such as money and books, looking for ways to give, rather than get, is an important thing that successful people do.

Research has shown that giving makes people happier than receiving and if you are genuinely happy with your life and the person that you are, you are more likely to be successful.

If any of these habits intrigue you, choose one to focus on for the next few weeks. It can take about four to six weeks for a new habit to become automatic, depending on the difficulty of the habit.

Determine the actions you need to take to develop the habit. Set a consistent time of day, every day to work on it, using a trigger or cue (a previously established habit like brushing your teeth) to remind you.

Create accountability by telling your habit plans to someone else or reporting on your efforts on social media. If you miss a day, just pick up the next day, and don't beat yourself up.

Once your first habit feels solid, move on to another so that you build a series of positive habits that will make you wildly successful too!

Article source: http://tiny.cc/o249my

Thursday, 8 September 2016

Six Fail-Safe Tips to Make You More Persuasive

By Kurt A Tasche

HOW can some individuals be so persuasive while others cannot appear to encourage anyone to do anything?

Persuasion is part art and part science. Some people are born with the charisma that most people lack. But anyone can become more persuasive with the right approach.  

Have you got the power of persuasion? (By freedigitalphotos.net)
 Anyone that can read or write can influence others successfully.

What would it mean to your professional and personal life if you could reliably influence others? Very few abilities are as extensive in their advantages.

Persuade others to align with your mindset:

1. Produce a connection with those you wish to influence. Whether you’re aiming to influence a single person or a thousand, it is essential to produce relationships.

The level of trust and connection you can develop will directly influence your capability to affect others. This is an essential first step. There are lots of ways to establish a connection:

* Show what you share in common.

* Mirror and match the other person’s body movements and gestures.

* Be sincere and real.

* Show others that you can be trusted.

2. Be convincing. You might feel very small and insecure. However, holding yourself in that manner won’t encourage anybody that they should follow you.

There are a number of ways we show an absence of conviction, such as body language, using qualifiers like, ‘I think, probably, maybe and possibly’, and absence of eye contact.

Stand tall, look them in the eye, and present your viewpoint like it’s an apparent truth. Your self-confidence is key.

3. Use reciprocity to your advantage. Research studies reveal that you’re far more likely to return a favor after someone does something for you.

That’s why the people who knock on your door and aim to offer you vinyl siding offer you a pen or a magnet. They understand that you’ll be more likely to buy from them.

Do something for the individual you’re trying to persuade. You might buy them lunch, drive them to the airport, or let them borrow a cup of sugar.

Do something for them prior to you trying to persuade and influence them. Your odds of success will increase drastically.

4. Consider their interests. Even the most honorable of people question what’s in it for them. Make it clear exactly what they’ll be receiving out of the deal.

Your neighbor might not want to accept your idea of building a fence between your properties.

Nevertheless, he may change his mind if you can show him the advantages he’ll be enjoying.

You might explain that your dog will stop leaving ‘gifts’ on his lawn.

It may help the resale value of his house.

It may minimize the amount of weeds on your lawn spreading to his.

It will increase his level of privacy.

5. Be an excellent listener. The other party matters a lot. We tend to only consider ourselves when we’re aiming to be influential, however this is a serious error.

Open your ears and close your mouth. When you comprehend the needs of the other individual, you’ll understand how to influence them.

6. Develop yourself as an authority. If you hung around with the Dalai Lama and wrote three books on meditation, your viewpoints on the subject are much more likely to be valued and appreciated.

Wearing a suit would convey authority in the right setting.

Persuasion is a highly researched topic. There are countless resources if you wish to learn more.

The capability to influence others is useful both in and outside of work. Invest some time in practicing this important skill. You’ll be glad you did!

Kurt Tasche is a martial artist, internet entrepreneur and motivational coach, who writes articles and produces videos on the subjects of marketing and personal development.

You can connect with him on his Facebook Page here.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9507988

Tuesday, 22 December 2015

How to Bolster Self Confidence

By Lesley A Knowles

SUCCESS articles often describe ‘confidence’ as a vital ingredient of success, serenity and happiness. People with conviction will find it easier to accomplish personal objectives.

However, it takes time and a great deal of effort to develop self-esteem, especially in a challenging environment.  

Build your confidence - and make 2016 YOUR year
Go through the following pointers and see how you can apply these in your daily life:

* Make friends but see to it that you have good company. Socialize with colleagues but keep it to a certain point where you respect each other and avoid over-familiarity.

Friendship boosts the confidence of everyone. Likewise, avoid a negative atmosphere. Do not be involved in a situation where you have to fight it out with peers just to stay on top.

This kind of environment is full of people who do not appreciate what others do. It erodes your self-confidence.

* Socialize with other people since it hones your social dexterity.

Yet, refrain from people who may cause negative vibrations for you, because this will only disrupt your efforts for self-improvement.

Shun rumor-mongers, naggers, backstabbers and people who complain too much.

* Be aware of the evolving environment. Remember that change will test your patterns in life. It affects your adaptability and thoughts.

Change is evident and constant. It is quite complicated and leads to undue pressures. Nonetheless, change will eventually make you better and stronger.

* Do not be influenced by all the negative happenings around you. The world is full of pessimism. It is up to you to cast away all this disapproval and put the positive notions on top.

You must learn to cope with all kinds of challenges to beef up your self-confidence.

* It is essential for you to know different skills. Maintain your interest in various aspects of your daily life.

Keep track of developments around you and try to know something about everything. You have to be well-informed of political, social, economic, environmental and lifestyle issues.

Becoming optimistic is your choice. This also holds true for building confidence. It is not a policy, gift or something that is born instantly.

You have to choose and develop confidence. The rule is to make things happen.

Figure out the areas where you need to improve and work on those promptly. You are in control of your goals and values if you manage to develop self-worth.

When you achieve confidence, life will be more pleasant and the road to success will turn out less grueling.

Thursday, 16 April 2015

Why Your Limitations Really Hold You Back

By Dr Jaime Kulaga

SOMETIMES, as life passes us by, we reflect on where we are and think about how we wish things were different. It is not only life that we wish was different, but our self too.

Maybe there are certain physical or mental aspects about you that hold you back. Some people have lost limbs (physical) where others battle Bi-Polar disorder, low self-esteem, or ADHD (mental). 

Free yourself from your limitations
But dwelling on all your limitations will prove to the world and yourself, that they are in fact limitations.

You will quickly find yourself in a very negative cycle. In fact, this negative cycle of thought not only reduces your self-confidence, but also the confidence that other people have in you.

Take a moment to think about being in a job interview. Would you sit there and spend your 45 minutes of interview time letting the interviewer know all of your limitations?

Why not? Answer this yourself.

If your answer was something along the lines of, "Because they wouldn't give me the job," then you get why you can't focus on your limitations when going about your day-to-day life.

Forty five minutes of dwelling on your limitations could really hinder you from having the life you wished for.

On another note, some people dwell on their limitations and share them with the world because they don't want others to hold them so accountable or don't want others to expect too much from them in case they can't come through.

This lack of confidence is hindering a life of happiness. Instead of people expecting a lot from them, people pity them.

And, while being pitied here and there might feel good, being pitied all the time just confirms to our mind that even others agree that our limitations hold us back.

As we focus on what we don't have the ability to do, we unconsciously create a self-fulfilling prophecy regarding how our limitations deter us from moving forward.

Consequently we don't live the life we wish we had. The reality is there are millions of people with mental and physical illnesses or pains living every day as if it were their dream.

They are achieving goals and climbing mountains. Instead of dwelling on your limitations, you must accept them and create a "work around".

Just as you find ways to work around other barriers that rise up in life, you must create one for what you perceive are your limitations, too.

This week's goal: Begin switching focus on what you do have to work with in life as opposed to what you don't have.

And begin your "work around" for your limitation in order to live the life you wish for.

__________

Dr. Jaime Kulaga is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Motivational Speaker.

She is the author of "The SuperWoman's Guide to Super Fulfillment: Step-by-Step Strategies to Create Work-Life Balance."

She is the inspirational founder of the nationally known SuperWoman Workshops. Dr. Kulaga has been featured internationally for her expertise in Work-Life Balance. http://www.mindfulrehab.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/8978060

Sunday, 18 May 2014

20 Things Confident People Never Do

Guest post by Barrie Davenport

HER heart was pounding. A dozen pairs of eyes were staring her way.

The only thing between her and complete nakedness was a thin robe. And she was about to drop the robe, step up on a platform, and stand before all of these people without a stitch of clothing.

Visual by quotestree.com
The instructor looked at her, letting her know the time had come. She took a deep breath and let the robe fall to the floor. She’d never felt so exposed, so vulnerable.

After a few minutes of staring over the heads of everyone in the room, she dared to look at a few faces. They were intently focused on sketching her, their faces composed in intense concentration. They weren’t judging her. They were viewing her body as something beautiful, something to be rendered on paper with emotion and grace. She was art.

She began to relax. Over the next hour, she not only felt confident standing naked before these artists — she felt empowered. Not so much because she was showing off her body, but because she dared to do something she feared so deeply. If she could do this, she could do anything.

Imagine that feeling — having the self-confidence to fearlessly do anything you set your mind to. Imagine being able to drop your metaphorical robe and master the thing that scares you.

Most confident people weren’t born that way. Like everyone, they’ve had their share of fears and insecurities. But confident people haven’t allowed those fears and insecurities to control their destinies. They’ve learned to be proactive in changing the thoughts, behaviors, and decisions that keep them stuck in a compromised and contained life.

Here are twenty things confident people NEVER do:

1. Tell themselves stories

Confident people don’t lie to themselves. They don’t believe the negative thoughts like, “I’m too old,” or “I’m not smart enough,” or “I’m not attractive enough.” They don’t hide behind denial or limiting beliefs so they have an excuse to remain stuck in the status quo. They are real with themselves, even when the truth seems daunting.

2. Avoid speaking up

They have ideas and beliefs and can freely share them in personal and business settings. They have personal boundaries and can kindly communicate them to people who try to step past those boundaries. They don’t clam up for fear of saying the wrong thing, stepping on toes, or looking foolish. They’ve learned how to communicate with confidence in an emotionally mature way.

3. Let failure hold them back

Confident people understand failure is necessary for success. They know failure holds many lessons that can be used for the next attempt. Of course they feel the sting of failure and must take time to grieve it, but they are able to move past it and try again — as many times as necessary. Failure isn’t an excuse to quit.

4. Please others to win approval

They don’t compromise their own desires, goals, or needs in order to make others like them or approve of them. They don’t succumb to the “need to please.” They can tolerate the discomfort of disappointing others or not fitting in when it’s in their own best interest or allows them to be authentic.

5. Over-focus on appearance

When you’re self-confident, you have a healthy relationship with your appearance. You improve the things you can, put your best foot forward, and strive to be healthy and well-groomed. And then you accept yourself as you are. You understand appearance does not define you or reflect your ability to be successful. Confident people have enough self-respect to stay fit and eat healthy foods because they know their bodies deserve to be cared for properly.

6. Have poor body language

They don’t avoid eye contact. They don’t keep their arms crossed or heads down. They don’t forget to smile frequently or offer a firm handshake. They’ve learned that even when they aren’t feeling confident, their body language can help turn that around. They know by practicing confident body language, they are sending positive messages to their brains to reinforce the feelings of confidence. And other people will view them as confident, which further empowers them.

7. Put others down to feel good

They don’t need to undermine other people or make negative comments about their success or wealth in order to build themselves up. They are genuinely happy for the successes of others and allow themselves to feel inspired by those successes. They don’t assume successful people have something special others don’t have. They look to other happy, successful people for ideas and motivation to create this same success in their lives.

8. Try to hide their mistakes

People with self-confidence know that mistakes are inevitable, and they are quick to own up to them. They apologize when necessary and do what needs to be done to fix the situation. They don’t cast blame elsewhere or try to pretend the mistake wasn’t really a mistake. They take full responsibility for their actions and decisions.

9. Settle for mediocre

Self-assured people have a vision for what they want, and they go for it. They don’t hold back and allow their fears to keep them from trying. They push themselves to go above and beyond. They set the bar high for themselves and demand excellence. They know they are as deserving of the best in work and life as anyone else.

10. Avoid connecting with others

Staying isolated and disconnected is a sign of low self-confidence. You don’t want to put yourself out there in front of others because you don’t want them to see you fail, look foolish, or pass judgement on you. With self-confidence, you don’t avoid connecting with others. You seek it out. You see the value in having a community of people with whom you share ideas, friendships, partnerships, and inspiration. You reach out and intentionally make these connections.

11. Resist learning new things

Those with confidence want to be life-long learners. Even when they are experts in their fields, they have a learner’s mindset, knowing there is so much more in life to achieve and so many ways to grow. They aren’t entrenched in old ways of doing things or old beliefs about what is right or best. They look for ways to stretch themselves through new endeavors.

12. Focus more on weaknesses than strengths

Many people think they should put more time into strengthening their weaknesses. Those with confidence understand that success comes with continuing to improve upon your strengths. They are able to accept their own weaknesses gracefully, and put more time and effort into endeavors where they know they’ll have more likelihood of success. They maximize their time and energy this way and don’t feel bad about it.

13. Compromise their values

Having defined core values gives you foundational principles for anything you pursue in life. Living in alignment with these values ensures you will never compromise yourself or what you hold dear. With confidence, you use these values as you make decisions in your life and work, even if it means giving up something desirable in the short term.

14. Avoid seeking help when they need it

When you are confident, you don’t feel “lesser than” when you need help or support. You recognize that asking for help is a sign of strength and self-worth, not weakness. When you have a problem you can’t figure out or you’re dealing with unexpected painful emotions, you don’t hesitate to reach out to a friend or professional.

15. Ignore their own intuition and judgement

Self-confident people don’t assume other people have all the answers or know best. They value their own good judgement and listen to their own intuition. They  recognize they have the ability to come up with the answers for most situations on their own. They can seek input and guidance, but also can feel comfortable making a final decision when the time comes.

16. Neglect to improve their skills

So much of low self-confidence comes from not having the skills or training needed for great success. Those with confidence see clearly what they need to do to improve their chances of success, and they are willing to commit the time and energy into improving their skills, advancing their training, or getting more education in order to be more confident in their abilities.

17. Try to change their personality

You can be an introvert or an extrovert and still be confident. You can be a left-brained or a right-brained thinker and still be confident. Confident people understand that self-assurance comes from feeling good about who you are and what you can achieve by being completely authentic. They don’t try to be someone they’re not. Self-acceptance is a vital element of self-confidence.

18. Look to their love relationship to fulfill them

People with low self-confidence often have poor relationships since they feel needy and insecure. Because they aren’t confident in themselves, they hope they’ll be fulfilled by getting constant reassurance and attention from their partner. But people who are self-assured understand they need to love and respect themselves in order to have a strong and healthy love relationship. They are willing to learn the skills of emotional intelligence and healthy communication and conflict resolution.

19. Over-complicate their lives

Often when we’re lacking confidence, we create an “adrenaline-fueled” lifestyle in order to avoid facing our insecurities or act on our deepest desires. Confident people know what they want in each area of their lives and find a way to balance and prioritize. They are comfortable making hard decisions and saying no to some things in life in order to experience the best of what they want the most.

20. Assume they are done improving their confidence

Living with confidence requires a lifetime commitment to practicing the skills of confidence. Those who understand this realize there will be times in life when their strength will be tested, when they will falter and fail. But they have an arsenal of skills to draw from in order to boost their own confidence when they are down. They recognize the tremendous value of these skills because they know how powerful self-confidence is and how profoundly it has upgraded their life.

Do you see yourself in any of the behaviors confident people never do? If so, remember self-confidence is a skill you can learn, just like any other skill. You don’t have to accept low self-confidence as your life sentence. You can feel empowered and proud of who you are and what you can achieve.

Drop the robe of fear, self-doubt, and inaction, and do something that will upgrade every aspect of your life — rebuild your confidence.

This article first appeared at http://liveboldandbloom.com

Source: http://tiny.cc/20Never

Wednesday, 26 March 2014

Why And How You Should Practice Mental Fitness

Guest post by Alex Petryck


THE importance of physical fitness is all over the media, and there is a good reason for that fuss. When you keep your body healthy, you will prevent many serious health conditions and preserve your well-being for longer. However, the aspect of health that’s not getting enough attention is mental fitness. Who needs a healthy, flexible and lean body without a healthy and flexible mind?
How's YOUR Mental Fitness?

Before going on with the importance of mental fitness, let’s explain what it is – it’s the work you invest into your psychological well-being and your ability to find joy in each moment of life. There are three ways to go – keeping up with stress and anxiety, becoming dull and unable to find interest in anything, or maintaining your mind sharp and active for as long as possible. It’s your choice and you are making it every day.
Why should you practice mental fitness?
You start and end each day with hygiene activities, don’t you? You wash your hands, brush your teeth and take a shower every day. Are you doing something for your mental hygiene? You should! Your mind is also full of impurities that require cleansing: stressful thoughts, worries, envy, lack of will, dullness, doubt, restlessness… the list goes on and on. Maintaining a culture of mind means that you need to cultivate positive values, such as consciousness, good will, agility, self-confidence, joy, and happiness.
Stress is an inseparable part of modern life, but you can make a real difference in the way you deal with it. Instead of cultivating a restless mind, why don’t you work on maintaining a peaceful state of an undisturbed mind? Today it’s “cool” to be unsatisfied, disgruntled and resentful. Is that really the way you want to spend your life? Mental fitness does not mean being inactive. It simply means to cultivate positive values and keep your mind active towards something that will make you happy.
Everyone is interested in healthy aging, but most people limit their efforts to maintaining their physical strength. Physical fitness is certainly important, but mental fitness is the only way to prevent the signs of mental aging.
How to practice mental fitness
Now that you know about the importance of mental purity, it’s time to learn how to achieve it. What exactly can you do to keep yourself mentally fit?
  1. The best way to keep your mind focused, steady, and undisturbed is meditation. It takes time and practice to achieve real meditation, but that shouldn’t prevent you from being persistent with it. Start with simple concentration on your breathing for 10 minutes a day, and extend the amount of time gradually – you will notice how your mind is becoming steadier by the day. Meditation doesn’t come easily, and you should definitely seek for proper guidance from a certified instructor.
  2. Read a lot! Don’t limit your daily reading to random internet articles that don’t teach you anything new. Everything you read should contribute towards your mental fitness, so forget about the Kardashians and start looking for valuable reading to spend your time with. It’s important to read widely and exercise your brain in different areas. The best way to keep your mind healthy is to learn something new every day, but don’t limit yourself to superficial knowledge.
  3. Challenge yourself intellectually. Learn a new language, read War and Peace, solve some math problems from time to time… do anything that would challenge your intellect and test your memory.
  4. Engage in meaningful conversations. If your friendships and family relationships have fallen into a routine, you have to do something about it because those relations are important for your mental health. Talk to the people you love about a wide range of topics that aren’t limited to “how was your day?” Your social life can literally save your mental health in bad times.
  5. Have a hobby. Find something you love and devote time to it. You cannot keep your mind healthy if you don’t engage in something that interests you.
  6. Turn off the TV and spend a few days away from the computer. TV shows and Internet distractions are making you dull and inactive. Spend some time away from them and you will immediately notice how your brain is becoming sharper.
  7. Pay attention! This is associated to meditation – you should extend your consciousness throughout the entire day. Are you forgetting whether you turned off the iron or not, or where you put the keys? The only way to boost your memory is to pay attention to everything you do. Your thoughts should always be here and now.
Conclusion
Why do you need mental fitness? – Because I cannot imagine a happy man or woman who doesn’t have a balanced mental activity. You cannot be peaceful if you can’t take control over the restlessness of your mind. Everything you do and feel comes from the way you handle your thoughts. If you think well, you will speak and act well, and you will feel well about the life that surrounds you.
Alex Petryck is a business administration student and freelance journalist. He likes traveling, cryptography and also writes for best essays writing company.
Article source: http://tiny.cc/nvrbdx

Thursday, 13 February 2014

The 'Skill' of Self Confidence

Posted by John Lee of YourBestYouEver.net

I have to admit, I've never considered self-confidence a 'skill'. For me, it's always been a character trait that some people have in abundance, while others don't.

Dr Ivan Joseph, speaking at TED in the US
As a youngster, I always fell into the latter category. I was seen as 'a little bit shy'... my older sister being the 'more outgoing one'.

That will no doubt strike a chord with many people and it's one of those throwaway comments you hear as a child that ultimately shapes your thinking and development.

The passage of years and life experience have changed my view somewhat, but to hear self-confidence described as something that can be 'trained into a person' was still very intriguing.

And it's just one of the subjects covered by athletic director and head soccer coach at Ryerson University, Dr. Ivan Joseph, in the lively video presentation you can access below.

Filmed at TED in the US, Dr Joseph explains how he successfully 'trained' self-confidence into a Colombian goalkeeper, who now plays top-level soccer, and how anyone can develop the 'skill' simply and effectively.

He also covers subjects such as:

* The vital nature of persistence

* The threat of unhelpful self-talk

* How to combat negativity and nip it in the bud

* How to build self-confidence in others

Dr Joseph is clearly passionate about what he does and delivers his talk with enthusiasm, humor and a great sense of fun. Click on the link below to tbe taken to the original recording.

http://youtu.be/w-HYZv6HzAs

Wednesday, 29 January 2014

Willpower and Self-Control: What Recent Research Reveals

A guest post by clinical psychologist, Dr. Tali Shenfield, first posted by Barrie Davenport at ‘Live Bold & Bloom’


SO you have a goal in mind, but you can’t seem to meet it.
No matter how hard you try, you keep getting sidetracked. 
Do you have the willpower you desire?
Maybe you’re trying to get a project for work completed, but the incessant “ping!” of a new email or text message arriving to your phone has you glancing away from the task.
Or maybe you’re working toward a healthy weight target, but those cupcakes in the kitchen are calling your name.
The diversions of self-control are all around us, tempting us to forgo our intentions and goals.
Are some people more predisposed at pushing those deterrents to the background? Is there a way to boost our ability to control ourselves and strengthen our willpower?
How can we keep distractions from bogging us down?
There are, in fact, scientists working to answer these questions, and we can use their findings to benefit our pursuits.
Recent evidence suggests that the ability to resist temptation is stronger in some people than others.
According to survey conducted by American Psychological Association, only about 15% of people have impenetrable willpower, focus and control over their actions, and about just as many give in to almost anything that crosses their path.
The remaining two thirds are about equally prone to straying from the control we seek to have over ourselves, sometimes resisting temptation, other times not.
Despite this statistic, it is a worthwhile pursuit to try to become better at resisting temptation and have more willpower.

The positive outcomes of self-control

Studies have shown that self-control is often associated with other positive traits.
In the April, 2004 issue of the Journal of Personality, Tangney, Baumeister and Boone found that young people with higher scores on their measure of self-control had higher grade point averages, higher self-esteem and confidence, less psychopathological problems, less eating problems, and lower ratio of drug and alcohol addictions.
They also had better relationships and interpersonal skills and more optimal emotional responses.  It is important to keep in mind when reading these correlations that they do not imply simple causation.
In other words, these positive traits were associated with self-control, but they were not necessarily caused by it.
So what can we do to boost our willpower and ability to lean away from instant gratification? Evidence suggests that keeping your focus on concepts rather than details can help.
Research findings of Dr. Kentaro Fujita, an Assistant Professor of Psychology at the Ohio State University, suggest that using self-control to do something difficult or undesirable now (for benefits in the long run) can be made easier by keeping in mind WHY we’re doing it, rather than focusing on the details.

A global perspective

That is to say, taking a long-term perspective or viewing the goal from a distance can help. This is referred to as high-level construal.
It allows us to think about the ends rather than the means. In his study, participants were asked to take this approach by reminding themselves of the reasons that they chose to maintain good physical health.
This is in contrast to what psychologists call low-level construal. This approach forces us to look at the means rather than the ends of our goals that require self-control.
Such an approach is not beneficial to self-control as it has us bogged down in the minutiae. 
Fujita’s participants in this condition of his experiments were told to think about how they maintain good physical health.
Fujita’s findings offer additional suggestions on ways to increase self-control. In a 2008 article in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, he advises global processing, abstract reasoning and high-level categorization.
Global processing suggests that we should see the whole forest (not the trees) and consider each choice as part of a long-term goal.
Abstract reasoning means thinking philosophically – avoiding the details and focusing on how everything fits into the larger scheme of things. So when you want to maintain a regular gym regime, for instance, you may imagine your ideal self or how exercise connects mind and body.
High-level categorization helps self-control because it encourages us to categorize components that need to be achieved in order to maintain self-discipline and stay on track with our objectives.
Each of these strategies instructs an individual to think more globally and abstractly so as not to get easily side-tracked.  In this way, one does not get deterred or put off a goal and self-control becomes more manageable.
As you learn to delay gratification, improve your willpower, and exhibit more self-control, you’ll accomplish more and feel better about yourself. Your confidence and self-esteem will improve dramatically as a result.

Author BioDr. Tali Shenfield is a Clinical Psychologist and Director of Richmond Hill Psychology Center.
She holds a PhD in Psychology from the University of Toronto and is a member of the College of Psychologists of Ontario, Canadian Register of Health Service Providers in Psychology, and Canadian Psychological Association.
When she has free time from psychological assessments and psychotherapy, Dr. Shenfield enjoys writing articles for her psychology and parenting blog. You are welcome to visit her blog and follow Dr. Tali Shenfield on Twitter at @DrShenfield.
Article source: http://tiny.cc/5iyfax

Friday, 8 November 2013

Reaching Your Full Potential

By Margo Kirtikar Ph.D.

HOW would you like to reach your full potential? 'Me?' you might think, 'But...' and then you'll begin to list a number of reasons of why it's not possible for you to do that.

Not enough education, bad childhood memories, no support network, you don't think you're smart enough and on and on goes on the list of why it's not possible.


But what if I told you that, 'Yes you can', just like that. All you need to do right away is to change your mindset from the impossible to the possible.

Tell yourself right now that you can, and believe it is possible, against all the odds. Why ever not? It is possible for you to reach your full potential because you just made up your mind that you can do it.

That thought in itself makes it possible. You have already taken the first step on the path towards this goal. All doubts and insecurities have disappeared.

Stand up straight hold your head up high, put a smile on your face and have faith in yourself. Having faith in yourself is the same as having faith in God.

You now expect miracles in your life and you know what, you're going to have them. So be convinced, keep alert and watch out for them.

You are now a full-fledged optimist, you have faith and what's more, you believe in miracles.

Now do you feel energized with that idea? Of course you do. A positive attitude towards life energizes you. It makes you vibrate at a higher level. It's invigorating and exciting.

Doubt, low self esteem, disbelief, despair drain you of your energies and concentration powers. They send your vibration level rocketing downwards leaving you almost paralyzed unable to think, let alone act.

So go back to your positive thoughts, your are now well on the path to reach your full potential, with confidence, commitment and effort.

Good now focus on your goal, as you explore your possibilities. Figure out what your strengths and gifts are. Everyone has some, find out yours and work with that.

Acknowledge your weaknesses and vulnerable points and accept them. It's OK. Don't let this get you down. Everyone has weaknesses.

Successful people use their strong points, to their advantage to get them to their goals and they also reserve some time every day to improve their weaker points.

That is how one gets stronger and better every day, with dedication to a specific goal, unwavering commitment and constant effort. Nothing is achieved without effort.

That's what it takes - focus with self confidence, total commitment, effort and persistence.

Spend a little time every single day on meditation or reflection. Call it quiet time if you prefer; it doesn't matter.

The point is you sit down at a specific time in a specific place every single day to be quiet with yourself, alone with or without your thoughts.

This is called food for your soul. In time you will be in union with your soul. Your soul is the best guide you can have who works with you through your intuition.

You will be astonished at what this little quiet ritual will do for you. In a week's time, you will be calm, centered and balanced.

Your concentration powers will improve, your mind becomes clearer, creative ideas come to you from nowhere, and you will be aware enough to recognize all that and use it all to your advantage.

This is called being Zen. And it's an easy state to achieve - just stick to the ritual and keep at it. After a few months you'll be wondering how you managed to exist without it.

Be Zen. Quiet time is food for your best friend and guide... your soul.

Another thing you will need to do is to allocate a little more time each day to learning. Read, watch videos, visit workshops, whatever is possible and convenient for you to do.

Do whatever it takes to feed your intellect and mental body. Learn about your profession, too, so that you are always well informed. Read news and business magazines relevant to your area of work.

The more you know, the more confidence you will gain and the better you can do your work.

Learning, reading, acquiring knowledge is food for your brain and your intellect. You cannot allow yourself to stagnate. A little every day is better than a lot once in a while.

You will need to take care of your emotional body too.

This you do by giving attention to your private life, your personal relations with all your family members, with your friends and everyone you come in contact with.

This is important for your emotions to keep them balance and alive, so you can practice interacting and communicating with your fellow humans.

It helps you become a sensitive, compassionate, refined character, commanding respect from all around you. Practice kindness, understanding, consideration, compassion and a generosity of heart.

Be happy with yourself who you are and what you are all about. Be authentic and honest always,. You can never go wrong with that and you can sleep like a baby at night.

You are unique - there's no one else out there just like you. Be proud of who you are and do everything in life so you can remain proud of who you are. Be a person of integrity that everyone can trust.

Practice trust, honesty and good humor.

Be grateful and make a point of being grateful every single day for what you have. Don't yearn for what you don't have. Yearning for something far away is a waste of time

Of course you can dream, but don't let the yearning eat you up inside. Instead work on achieving a little more every day of what you aspire for, without losing sight of what is right and wrong.

We build our future brick by brick and we need to make sure that every brick is solid and of good quality before we add the next one on top. Otherwise, whatever we build will topple down like a pack of cards.

We live in a complex world; there's much that no one really understands. But with modern technology we have all the knowledge possible at our fingertips.

We need to be curious and enthusiastic about knowledge and about life in general. Changes are coming fast so we can't afford to be rigid in our viewpoints.

Stay with it and be informed of what goes on at work, at home, and in the world at large.

Have an open mind and be flexible. Keep what makes sense and forget what does not make sense to you.

And don't hesitate to change your mind if you find yourself on the wrong track. On the other hand, do not give up too easily.

Last but not least, don't be too shy or afraid to ask for help from experts. Don't allow yourself to be misguided, bullied or talked into doing anything you don't want to do.

Think for yourself. You make up your own mind. Don't let others make up your mind for you.

You are unfolding like a flower bud, enjoy the process, laugh and have fun.

-----

I have dedicated my life to helping, coaching, guiding, people on their life path. My clients find me through word of mouth, or through the web, my blog and articles.

My main website is http://www.margokirtikar.com. My email is margoatmargokirtikar.com and you can read my blog at http://www.mindempowerment.net/blog.

I am a spiritual teacher - nothing to do with any specific religion. That is your own private matter. What I do is I help you to contact your inner Divine Spark and that is what helps you to reach your full potential.

That little Divine Spark of God within you is the Spirit within that needs to come through to shine through you. This applies to all human beings of every color, race, gender and religious belief.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/7209402

Friday, 23 August 2013

Getting Rid of Limiting Beliefs through Hypnosis

By John Lee

AS amusing as it can be, the kind of 'stage hypnosis' that most of us have seen on TV shows is only one facet of what is a highly effective and often life-changing form of therapy.

Brennan Smith of naturalhypnosis.com
Whether it's phobias, bad habits we'd like to give up or issues such as increasing self-confidence or dealing with fears of specific situations, hypnotherapy has proven its worth for decades.

And the video below outlines just what can be achieved through hypnotherapy, courtesy of an interview with Brennan Smith of naturalhypnosis.com

Among the subjects he covers are:

* The 'Biology of Belief', as explained by the eminent developmental biologist, Bruce Lipton

* The 'Accelerated Learning State' and how hypnosis can help us reach it quickly and effectively

* How hypnotherapy can be used to banish unhelpful Limiting Beliefs

He also tells the story of how a client who was so shy he felt incapable of even talking to an attractive woman overcame his issue after just one session... without even realizing the massive change he'd made!

It's incredible stuff. Just click on the link below to go to the recording:

http://tiny.cc/nut91w

Wednesday, 26 December 2012

Post by John Lee and feature by Mike I McClement

Whenever a New Year comes along, many people seem to approach this perceived milestone even though it's a mere passage of time with a certain amount of trepidation and often a very worthy determination to make their life more enjoyable.

So I thought this highly practical guide to building your self-confidence, self-belief and self-esteem by personal development coach, Mike McClement, might be a useful addition to my blog. As you'll see, it's full of great advice and is an excellent way to take stock of your life.

Over to Mike...

1. Know what you look like
Find out how people perceive you... if you look as though you lack confidence, then people will treat you as though you do. In other words, you're already on the back foot and it'll be a lot harder to get people to listen to you.

2. Sort out your body language
Like it or not, people suss you out quickly, mostly by taking in your body language and sound. So get yourself in front of a mirror and be honest with yourself. Do you look confident? If not, why not? Then practise looking confident. Look at your posture, your facial expression, your clothing... Sounds mad but it works.
Confident people are happy people

3. Don't say sorry
Are you a serial sorry sayer? A lot of people who lack confidence are. They apologise for everything. Well don't. Only apologise if your actions warrant an apology. Some people prefix everything they say with a 'sorry'. This is completely unnecessary and suggests you doubt yourself. You might as well hang a sign around your neck saying 'I lack confidence'.

4. Remember you're not unusual
Realise that you're not unusual. Even truly confident people have their ups and downs. They accept this as part of life. An embarrassing situation is an embarrassing situation.. so what? It happened, there's nothing you can change about it. So learn from it and move on.

5. Be realistic
Accept that you're not unlucky. No one was born confident. Confidence is a skill you can actually learn. Accept this and start to learn. Just like any other skill, it requires practice and self-discipline to get good at it. We can all do it as long as we accept the challenge.

6. Think positively
Understand your mindset. Be honest with yourself... are you a positive or negative thinker? Are you a pessimist or an optimist? This is important. It's impossible to feel and look confident if you approach life negatively. A problem is a challenge, a mistake is a lesson to be learnt, a failure is a fact of life.

7. Know where you're going
You'll achieve little, if nothing if you don't have a focus. So work out what you want to achieve, both at home and at work and write down a plan. Think strategically (say over 2 years) and more tactically (say 6 months). One leads on from the other - think strategically first and then decide what you need to do tactically to achieve this.

8. Be happy
Think carefully about what makes you happy and get some of it. Confident people tend to be happy people - just watch them and you'll see. That's because they've found a balance between the things they have to do and the things like doing. They're also realists. They accept that life is life and there are some things that just have to be done but they don't let these bog them down.

9. Smile more
Sounds mad but it's true. Smiling really does help you to feel and look more confident. Someone who walks into a room smiling looks confident. It's a fact. It's also true that smiling actually makes you feel happier. It releases endorphins into your system. This even happens when you make yourself smile... So it's worth the effort.

10. Control your emotions
Control your emotions but don't stifle them. Think about how you let them out. Don't make a fool of yourself. Take a deep breath, maybe a few minutes too and then explain your feelings in a controlled way. Confident people have the self-control to do this.

About the Author
Mike McClement is a Personal Development Coach and author on confidence. He is passionate about helping people develop their confidence and self esteem in both a personal and work environment.

To find out more about Mike visit http://www.think-confidence.com
Complete a free communication style questionnaire at http://www.think-confidence.com/questionnaires.html

(c) Mike McClement. All rights reserved worldwide

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Mike_I_McClement