Your Beliefs Are True For You

By Linda C Davies

It takes courage to be able to uphold your own beliefs when the majority of people in our culture do not support them. Even if a billion people disagreed with us about something, this does not mean we dismiss our own beliefs in order to seek their approval. Despite their protestations, they may be wrong about something and we may be correct.

If we look at human history, we can find many examples of people who were ostracized for attempting to come up with a new theory or idea about something that challenged the current paradigm of that time period. To their credit, many of these individuals did not waver in their strong beliefs or succumb to pressures that were imposed upon them by others to dismiss their own beliefs even at the expense of losing credibility within their professional or personal communities.

Although it may have been unpleasant for some people to have remained strong in their convictions, this does not mean everyone who has stuck to their beliefs have had negative experiences. There are probably just as many cases of people who were supported by others who trusted their newly creative endeavor or new idea would eventually materialize into something concrete or be recognized by society.

Thus, faith in themselves translated into others having faith in them. Even so, this does not mean others lack of support has necessarily deterred some who have a strong sense of self from believing something to be true.

Sometimes when an individual makes a statement about something that is seemingly unpopular, support for their opinions may come from the most unlikely individuals. It is not as if what they have said is not believed or felt by these people before; rather, these people who now support them have been too afraid to express the same thought or idea for fear of rejection and criticism by others who they assumed held opposite beliefs.

I often wonder when I am in a group setting how many people actually believe what they are saying or are they saying something in order to avoid others disapproval. I have found myself sometimes saying nothing rather than something about what I believe to be true in order to avoid others condemnation. However, more often than not, I find myself expressing what I believe to be true because I want to be true to myself.

It is important to be open to others opinion and realize even if they adamantly disagree with us, this does not in any way invalidate what we believe to be true. When we all come to terms with accepting what is true for ourselves, it will no longer matter what others think about us.

Although what I have just said may seem cliche, I think it is important to heeds these words. When one considers how group conformity is sometimes adhered to more often over individual opinions and expression, it is important to express one's uniqueness in order for this world to show her wonderful and colorful self to the fullest.

© 2012 Linda C Davies

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A Message From the Big 'U'

By Carol James

I am your best friend.

I am your confidant. You can tell me anything at all and I will always understand and love you. I know that you always do your very best and that sometimes your fears get the best of you. I know that you have come a long way and have grown and matured in immeasurable ways. To me, you are a beautiful, bright shining light, beaming with courage and soul.

I am always here for you, waiting at your beck and call. Tell me what you want. Tell me all your dreams and I will be delighted to help you live them. I can find people and arrange circumstances in ways that you could never imagine. Sometimes my orchestrations are called miracles, but I just see them as doing my job.

I am here for you. I have always been here for you, even when you did not know I existed. I am the one who brings people and circumstances to you. All that you experience is a result of that which I bring to you. All that I bring to you is a result of that which you ask for, even if you don't understand how you are asking.

It's really a simple relationship we have, you and I. It's one of master and slave, dreamer and dream maker. You are master and I am slave. But I love my job. I get to grant your wishes for a living so that's okay by me. Your wish is my command.

I am good at what I do. I am predictable, consistent, flexible, fluid, accurate and timely. You can always depend on me to give you exactly what you ask for when the timing is right. Be careful what you ask for, you might get it. I don't decipher or question your requests, I follow them to the letter.

I am compelled to bring to you all that matches what you focus on, regardless of how that focus causes you to feel. It doesn't matter whether you want it or not, because from my perspective if you didn't want it you wouldn't be focusing on it, so if you are focusing on it then you must want it. My job is to find stuff that matches your tone - your point of focus - and orchestrate the connection between you and it.

From my perspective, it's easy to see why you don't always like what you get, but I know that eventually you will come to remember all that you have forgotten. In the meantime, I will continue to be here serving your needs and fulfilling your wishes.

I am here for you. Ask anything of me. I have nothing to do but to serve you. The rest is up to you.

With over 25 years of business and personal development experience under her belt, Carol James is an Entrepreneur, Business Consultant, Mentor, Speaker, Writer, Workshop Developer and Facilitator and Email Newsletter Publisher. Her highly successful InspiredLiving.com web site has over 900 pages of products, resources and education to help people achieve a healthier lifestyle, cleaner environment and better attitude about life. Visit the web site at http://www.inspiredliving.com

Carol is passionate about helping people to achieve their highest vision of themselves, and loves working as a mentor to business owners, entrepreneurs and anyone who desires a healthier, happier more rewarding life experience. Her many workshops have met with lots of enthusiasm and high marks for excellence. For more information about speaking and workshop options and her professional background, visit http://www.caroljames.com

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The Rules of Hamster Thinking

By Douglas R Kruger

When you're the older brother, growing up with an unspeakably pretty kid sister is a recipe for stress. You invest in karate lessons and basic firearms training. You start early with the Prozac.

With a twelve-year age gap between us, I had already moved out of the house when I received the inevitable call from my parents, explaining, "We all knew this day had to come. Lauren's brought home the first one. We'd like you to come around and meet him, but a word of warning: He's surly, has a bad attitude and his hygiene is...questionable!"

This, of course, was Lauren's very first hamster. So I arrived to meet the new addition and there he was in his tiny cage.

As I leaned over him, the hamster got a fright and tried to make a break for it. But he started by jumping into his running wheel. When his frantic efforts finally fizzled, he got out of the wheel and turned to see if I was still there. I was. Hot on his heels. So he jumped back into the wheel and ran like a hamster-possessed all over again.

I watched him repeat this fascinating display over and over. Somewhere in the hypnotic episode, I came up with a new philosophy on life. (Some people have epiphanies at monasteries, some on mountain tops - what's wrong with having one in the presence of a fluff-ball named 'Chuckles'?). I called it: "The Rules of Hamster Thinking."

The Rules of Hamster Thinking Are:

1. Hamsters make up rules that work against them
2. Hamsters do things the way they've always been done and
3. Hamsters do what all other hamsters would do.

And Hamster Thinking is not limited to fluffy pet vermin. It's all over the corporate corridors too. 98 per cent of corporate employees are firmly entrenched hamsters. The other two per cent have an odd habit of moving the world forward.

So, what's the difference between them? The reasonable and the unreasonable? The hamster-ridden and the hamster-free? Grasp that distinction and not only can you begin your own hamster-exorcism ritual, but it might change the way you approach your business.

Can I Have A Volunteer?

In my keynote address on Hamster Thinking, I carry out an experiment. It tells me a great deal about the way people think and it works like this. A member of the audience joins me on stage. Without giving any instructions, I place a piece of string in front of their feet and a tennis ball in their hand. I walk to the far side of the stage and place a bowl on the ground. Then I issue my instructions: "Your mission is to get the ball in the bowl. Three... two... one... GO!"

Most people try to throw the ball across the stage into the bowl. Why? Because they are assuming they have to stand behind the piece of string. They have made up a rule that is working against them. And even if they lobbed that sphere with Glenn McGrath-like accuracy, it would simply bounce out, or knock the bowl over.

The hamster-free individual would simply walk over to the bowl and set the ball down gently within it.

The String Inside Your Mind

I've experienced this phenomenon many times myself, in the course of initiating big projects. It's all too easy to waver emotionally in front of a perceived piece of string. It's easy to make up reasons why it won't work. And yet, on the occasions when we take the risk, we often surprise ourselves with remarkable results.

The Piece of  String at the Radio Station Door

I can recount three separate occasions on which I wanted to present for different radio stations. Each time I felt the fear of the perceived piece of string. Each time, I reminded myself of the Rules of Hamster Thinking and opted to step over the string, walk through the front door of the station and try.

And each time, to my surprise, I got to see the person I needed to see and ended up presenting on that station. More often than we realise, the string exists only in our minds.

Don't waste time thinking about how everyone else does it. Instead, think 'end results.' You'll be surprised how this little Copernican Revolution jump-starts the creative part of your brain. Crystallize the goal and your creative mind can find the means. And the chances are that the means will not be conventional, because the results of convention are almost always 'average'.

Yet who wants to be average? Escaping your own hamster wheel begins with overcoming the first rule of hamster thinking: Don't make up rules that work against you.
After all, what's holding you back?...a piece of string?

Douglas Kruger is a professional speaker, trainer and author of the '50 Ways' series of books. His most booked keynote speeches are: The Rules of Hamster-Thinking, The Big Bum Theory, and How To Position Yourself As an Expert. See him in action or read more of his articles at: http://www.douglaskruger.co.za, email him at: kruger@compute.co.za

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We can all make a difference

As you sit at your desk on a normal working day – whether you love what you do or are less than enamoured with your current means of making a living – do you ever question your situation, as I do? Do you sometimes think to yourself, ‘I could, and probably should, be doing something much more worthwhile – something where I’m really making a difference to the wider world and the welfare of others’?

Since you’re reading this blog, you probably do, unless you’ve already found that calling, in which case, ‘Good on you!’ Really! For myself, I fall into the former category at the moment – and I do mean ‘at the moment’, because change is certainly on the way as I write this. But as I go about my daily life, there are certain sources of inspiration I keep close by to lift me when I need it.

One of these sources is a subscription to website by leading personal development teacher Bob Proctor, which is called ‘Insight of the Day’ (http://www.insightoftheday.com/). Anyhow, from Monday through Thursday, you receive inspirational quotes, to your designated email address, from the likes of Napolean Hill, Dale Carnegie, Tony Robbins, Jack Canfield, John Demartini, Bob himself and many, many other very wise and not so famous folk.

Every Friday, you receive an uplifting story, which often recounts how people overcame great odds to achieve success, dealt with difficult circumstances and relationships, made outstanding discoveries and achieved wonderful things in the face of adversity. And every so often there’s a simple tale of how someone just set out to make a real difference in a particular way or place. One such story recently found its way into my in box and so struck me that I decided to share it here.

As you’ll see, it’s by writer and blogger Sameer Vasta, and has a wider message for us all to consider when we’re sitting at our desk, pondering our current situation. Click on the blue hyperlink and you’ll also be taken to a website where you can find out more about the main subject. Enjoy!

Man grows 1,360-acre forest in India...by himself

A man in India single-handedly planted an entire forest, proving that one person really can make a large difference.

You always hear that one person can make a large difference in the world. Today, we’ve got a story that proves that saying.  When he was a teenager in Northern India’s Assam region about 30 years ago, Jadav “Molai” Payeng began planting seeds in a sandbar near his birthplace.

A few years later, he moved into the area and turned the seed-planting and tree-nurturing into his life’s work, planting seeds and helping them grow over a wide area that was initially left for desolate.

In the past 30 years, his seed-planting endeavors have resulted in a massive, 1,360-acre jungle in Assam, a forest ecosystem that has left an incredible mark on the Indian landscape and stands as a testament to Payeng’s dedication.

Initially, the forest department told Payeng that trees could not grow in that area. He was not dissuaded; instead he dedicated himself to the task of nurturing the forest, and his dedication has produced results.

The Molai woods, in addition to being covered with lush greenery, is now home to a whole host of creatures big and small, including birds, deer, rhinos, tigers, and elephants. Jadav “Molai” Payeng is a hero to those animals, to the ecosystem in the area, and to conservationists across India.

But he is also a hero to us, people living oceans away who don’t necessarily work in forestry or in the environment industry.

Payeng is a hero because he has proven that with commitment, blood, sweat, knowledge, and dedication to making a difference, one person can truly make a difference, and a large difference, to the world.

It’s easy to discount the impact that we can have on the people and places around us. It’s easy to feel insignificant when faced with the enormity of the issues that surround us. But it’s important to remember that our actions, no matter how small they may be, make a difference.

Whether it’s bringing a smile to someone’s day or revitalizing a forest ecosystem, the little acts of kindness and good have enormous impact. Our small actions may not necessarily lead to a forest and safe haven for animals, but they have the potential to grow and flourish all the same.

Sameer Vasta – Writer and Blogger

The Hidden Power Of The Compliment

By Marsha Egan

Can you remember the first conversation you had three days ago? How about what you had for dinner a week last Wednesday? No? You wouldn't be alone. However, I bet you could tell me the last time someone gave you a meaningful compliment. I'd be willing to bet that you can remember exactly what the compliment was.
What makes a compliment so memorable? Is it that we have some inbuilt mechanism for remembering compliments? More likely, it's simply their lack of frequency - they are a rare treat. They are also one of the greatest motivational tools available. What was it like last time someone complimented you? Did you feel warm? Happy? Energized? Did you feel encouraged to do more of what is was that provided you with the compliment in the first place?
Regardless of whether this happens at home or work; how easy is it to inject energy and positive motivation into that environment, and give the gift of that warmth, energy and happiness to the people around you? Praise costs nothing, but it is worth its weight in gold. So, if we all have the potential to enrich our homes, workplaces and organizations with this power, why don't we do it more often?
Positive reinforcement is a tactic every parent knows well, because recognizing someone's efforts and achievements is one of the simplest, yet most effective ways to reinforce positive behavior patterns and to empower them. We do it with our kids, subconsciously crave it for ourselves, yet for some reason forget how important it is for others in our lives, too.
You have to be smart about praise, though. Throwing random compliments at everyone isn't going to have the desired effect. Like all worthwhile things in life, you have to put some effort in to make it work. Here are three key rules to follow:
1. Be sincere. We all love praise, but if it isn't sincere, relevant or honest, then it will feel like what it is - false. If your choice of compliment isn't credible, then you won't be, either.
2. Be timely. Just as we punish our children as soon as possible after they do wrong to reinforce what behavior is unacceptable, the same is true of praise - it needs to be at the time the praiseworthy action occurred or as soon as possible afterwards.
3. Be creative. Say things the same way, and they'll quickly lose impact. Innovative methods generate energy, so mix it up and keep it fresh. If you praise someone outside formal channels, it will stick out to them and others more so, rather than keeping compliments for the morning staff meeting, be a little unexpected!
4. Be specific about what the compliment is about. You can't reinforce positive behavior if the person doesn't know what behavior is being reinforced! Instead of 'You did a good job on that presentation', try 'Thanks for your hard work on that presentation. You did some really great research and the additional information you found really brought the subject to life.'
5. Be selective. Don't worry about making people feel 'left out' when you compliment a single member of a team - the point of this sort of specific reinforcement is to be targeted so, if one member of a team stood out, tell them why they caught your attention, rather than just giving a half-hearted thank you to the whole team.
6. Be meaningful. Tailor what you say and how you say it to fit the recipient. Some people are naturally quiet and don't like 'fuss', whereas some people thrive on approval or are more outgoing. These people will love a public pat on the back, whereas others will hate it. When energizing a team member, communicate in a style which fits their own, as it will resonate with them more deeply.
7. Be proactive. After reading this, you may be all fired up with good intentions, but it's the action that counts. Don't forget to speak out, be creative and give out that energy, otherwise all you'll have is a good intention.
Ready to go but stuck for ideas? Why not try some of these ideas for some surprise-praise?
- Give someone a handwritten card or notelet. - Leave a small gift on someone's desk - flowers, candy, or a gift certificate. - Put congratulatory messages in the organization's newsletter. - Put a thank you note on a bulletin board.
The crux of the matter is that demonstrating to people that you respect, value and appreciate who they are and what they do unlocks a huge amount of discretionary effort and energy which reverberates through the organization. Fuelling your team on heartfelt, individual and targeted praise is quick, easy and doesn't need to cost a penny. When was the last time you did it? When will the next time be?

Marsha Egan, CPCU, PCC is CEO of The Egan Group, Inc., a Reading, PA based professional coaching firm. She is a certified workplace productivity coach and professional speaker, specializing in leadership development and can be reached at marsha@marshaegan.com or visit http://www.inboxdetox.com/.

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The Power of Letting Go

If you’re one of those people who’s seen the much talked-about movie, ‘The Secret’ perhaps – like me – more times than you could actually admit without feeling a tad embarrassed, there are probably particular scenes, anecdotes and ideas that stick in your mind.

(Briefly, in case you’re unfamiliar with what might be described as the quintessential ‘self-help’ movie, its main focus is to outline and explain the Law Of Attraction, which essentially states that what you think and, more importantly, feel  about on a regular basis becomes your reality.)

Well, one of the stories that always resonates with me is that of Jack Canfield – one of the people behind the ‘Chicken Soup for The Soul’ series of books – who relates how he has brought wealth, a beautiful home and many wonderful experiences into his life using the Law Of Attraction.

His method, outlined very roughly here, involves deciding what he wants, believing he can have it, believing that he’s worthy of it and then spending a short period of time every day, eyes closed, imagining that he’s already achieved the goal, with real emotion and gratitude. Then he just carries on with his day.

Having tried this myself, I have to say – again probably like a lot of people – my results have been mixed and often less than satisfactory. Or at least that was the case until I really understood the Power of Letting Go, which Jack does include in his description, in the sense of simply carrying on with his day.

Emotional detachment, that’s the way

But the point was only hammered home to me after I’d studied certain written materials by a couple of his fellow Personal Development leading lights – Dr Robert Anthony and Dr Joe Vitale, who’s also a star of ‘The Secret’.

In his best-selling book ‘The Attractor Factor’, Joe outlines five steps to manifesting what you desire in your life. I won’t spoil the surprise here – go get the book as it’s a great read – suffice to say the final step involves ‘letting go,’ or becoming emotionally detached from what you’re trying to achieve.

Apparently, if you find yourself in desperate need of what you claim to be trying to manifest, your emotion is one of scarcity – in other words you’re focusing on the fact that you don’t have it, rather than the experience of already having achieved your goal. So you’re just pushing the desired outcome further away.

Of course, maintaining detachment is easier said than done, but it certainly works. A very simple example from own experience involves the retirement of a colleague and a party being organised on his behalf. As he was a long-standing member of the team, we wanted to invite staff who had long since left the business.

Gratitude and a positive vibration

One name that came up was that of ‘Rocket Ron’ – he was crazy about motorcycles, you see – and no-one had seen him for over a year. Efforts were made to get in contact with him via one or two telephone numbers. Someone even stopped by his last-known address to see if he was still there, but to no avail.

I had known Ron a little through the day-to-day activities of the newspaper where we worked at that time – me as a writer, Ron in the photographic department – and brought to mind both his face and some of the conversations we’d had, laughing to myself about some of the more comical exchanges.

Then I just carried on with my work, without giving the matter any further thought…. or ‘letting go’, if you will. After all, though it would be nice to have Ron at the farewell get together for one of our soon-to-be former colleagues, it wasn’t that big a deal and it seemed we could do nothing about it anyhow.

That evening, I stopped off at the supermarket on my way home – a massive retail outlet, not a small local store. And yes, you guessed it, as I was making my way down one of the aisles, there was the man himself and I was able to invite him to the party.

It’s the kind of experience we can all relate to. You think about someone you haven’t heard from in a long time and someone suddenly mentions their name to you or they call you out of the blue. Some would call it pure coincidence, yet the latest studies in Quantum Physics are suggesting that we all really do play a part in creating our own universe at an energetic level.

So how do you achieve and maintain the level of detachment needed for manifestation? I guess it just takes practice, though one way I’ve found of doing so is to simply feel grateful for something – anything – in my life, once I’ve focused on my goal. This takes my thoughts away from the desire, while keeping me in a positive frame of mind, or ‘vibration’, if you like.

Still, haven’t got it down to a fine art, but I’m getting there!

A Simple Act Of Kindness - A Better World For All

THE other day, I got an email from one of the personal development world’s leading lights, in my opinion, Dr Robert Anthony. It was basically about the value and wisdom of carrying out ‘random acts of kindness’ – a wonderful way not only to brighten up someone else’s life but also bring a little extra joy into your own.

One of the examples of such a kindness mentioned by Dr Anthony was ‘giving the cashier eye contact and genuinely saying thank you’. And it’s a great example. How often have you rushed through the check-out at the supermarket, merely glancing at the person taking your money and handing you your change?

Smile and the world smiles with you

We’ve all done it, especially on those busy, stressed-out days when we’ve got a thousand and one things to tick off the list. But if you do take the time to stop, smile at the cashier, say ‘thank you’ and really mean it, you’ll get a positive reaction in most cases. The smile is particularly effective. Psychologists have actually discovered that it’s human nature to smile right back! In fact, we find it hard not to!

So both parties feel better and relax just a little bit more as a result of one tiny little act of warmth that costs no-one anything. But Dr Anthony’s ‘random act of kindness’ did more than make me think. It reminded me of a surprising, some would say ‘bizarre’, perhaps even ‘spooky’ exchange I once had with a cashier – all thanks to something I learnt from a marvellous book written by the late Bärbel Mohr, who was surely a very special lady.

‘Peace be with you’

As you’ve probably already guessed, the book in question is ‘The Cosmic Ordering Service’, which was written in the 1990s and primarily focuses on achieving your desires simply by placing an order with the universe. Well worth a read if you’re new to such concepts.

Yet while this is the main thrust of the book, there are also other ‘techniques’ outlined, one of which is a way of feeling better about people who you don’t automatically warm to and producing a similar reaction from them to you – or at least that’s how I interpret and use this. And here’s my story.

One busy Saturday morning, I was in a sporting goods store in my local mall. Can’t remember what I was buying but I was at the end of really long line of people, none of whom seemed to be exactly full of the joys of spring. Well, it was November, I suppose. But I digress...

A miracle at the mall?

The girl behind the counter at the other end was particularly surly and unhelpful, barely bothering to acknowledge the successive customers, each of whom turned to leave the store with a look of annoyance and disgust as they walked past me clutching their purchase.

I decided to try the technique I’d found in ‘The Cosmic Ordering Service’, which basically involves looking at the person in question and saying the phrase, ‘Peace Be With You’, over and over again in your head  – NOT out loud – and, again, putting some emotion into it.

As I approached the front of the queue, the girl continued to be ‘passively unpleasant’ to everyone; even a colleague who came along to ask a quick question at one point. So I told myself, ‘Either it didn’t work this time or it doesn’t work at all’.

Then it came my turn to be served. And, to my utter astonishment, she actually smiled – albeit in a sleepy and slightly ‘hung over’ way – as she apologised, saying something like, ‘Sorry, I had a bit of a late night last night. Was out with a few friends at a club and probably drank a bit too much’!

From there on, we had a really pleasant exchange, a laugh and a joke, and said goodbye to each other as I left, suggesting, light-heartedly, that she get a good night’s sleep that night. Now, some people might think her change in attitude and/or mood was just coincidence.

For myself, having learnt a little about how we’re all basically connected on a universally energetic level – not least from Dr Anthony himself – the phrase I repeated and the intention I attached to it played a major, major part. Why not try it for yourself?